Lead Your Life

Awake, Aligned, and Grounded In Truth

What are you trying to get right? May 21, 2018

A Flower Does Not Compete

Am I doing it right?  And if not, does that mean it’s wrong or that I can’t do it?

Recognize this inner dialog?

Let’s get granular for a moment and look at this on the yoga mat.  As we practice asana, consider the following suggestion:  Center yourself by grounding into stability, stilling your gaze, & engaging your core strength.  From there, allow your breath to lead your body into expansion as you unpack the pose.

This works for every asana in every style of yoga.  While a teacher might give detailed technical cues and even sometimes adjust your body through touch or verbal guide, the greatest wisdom you have is the information you are gathering and using in the moment about your experience today.

Why start with grounding?  This is a fundamental principle worth honoring as it creates a solid foundation rooted in safety & intention.  Our foundation is our clarity and still point.  It is the trunk of our gorgeous tree.

From a strong foundation, we can explore, experiment, and play with new possibilities and ways of being.  Warrior Two with the intention of JOY is the same as and different from Warrior Two steeped in the intention of CONFIDENCE.  Triangle today, running on too little sleep because of an emotional event in our life, is the same as and different from Triangle when we feel on top of the world.

Staying present to our state of being today and honoring ourselves with the “right” energy expense and deposit is self-care.  No teacher can do that work for you.  Self-compassion blossoms from inner knowing and love.

The practice of compassion is a choice.  What are we creating space for?  How can our breath lead us gently to observe versus do?  And perhaps from that place of witness, a choice to caress one day and break free the next.  When we drop out of thought and into experience, we receive the wisdom we need to unfold into the pose in that moment.

This is where the sacred lives.


Unveiling May 9, 2018


Recently, an Asheville writing coach & author of “Birth Your Story,” Jaime Fleres-Mizejewski, asked her tribe to share beyond the surface; our nuances, idiosyncracies, and soul’s truth.

Just writing this list reconnected me to ME, and connection to self is a portal to connection with the rest of the world.  When we get real with ourselves and celebrate our nuttiness, the walls of perfectionism dissolve in laughter.

Here’s my stream.

  • I adore hugs, despise small talk, and am at that annoying person at a party that wants to know your life view on the intersection of purpose and passion.
  • I believe each and every one of us is pining to come alive and show the world our amazingness.  Even that annoying guy who always calls me kiddo.
  • While I never aspired to the mommy parade, I adore my now teenagers with a fierceness that surprises even  me.  They exhaust, inspire, elevate, test, encourage, and crack me up.
  • I would like to meet the engineer who invented the beeping car alarm to simply ask one question; “Why?”
  • I believe in all of it, and I believe in the divinity of humanity.
  • I am a health fanatic, and it has taken me the better part of my 47 years to get that “wellness” has nothing to do with a number.
  • I practice yoga every (damn) day.  Oh yeah… I have also birthed two yoga studios and love to teach.
  • True to my gemini spirit, I am a total business nerd as well as angel communing, spirit animal loving, past life regressing Believer with a capital B.
  • I once marched dirty underwear out of my pant leg at Walmart.  Just another feather in the Amazon.com cap. 
  • I love to dance, travel, write, hike, sing, read, and throw things away.  I am a master purger of material items.  
  • Nothing makes me happier than feet on the earth.
  • I am quick off the starting line, bore in the middle laps, but finish all initiatives with a killer sprint. I super love to project plan.  
  • I feel over the moon privileged to live my life.
  • I am hungry for what’s next in my “do good in the world” wild safari.

Will you share yours?


Ubutu May 2, 2018

You are glorious and messy, brilliant and silly, beautiful and flawed.  And you are amazing.  Not because of what you do, the words you choose, or the impact you make.  You are amazing in your being.  Like mind-blowing, heart-soaring, soul-stirring AMAZING.  Do you believe it?

When you strip away your actions, roles, and contributions, can you see your AMAZING SELF as pure light?

There is a wonderful African Greeting:  Ubutu.  It translates to I SEE YOU.  We look so deeply at our children with pure love, and we encourage our friends to embrace their beauty when they self deface.  We talk about treating ourselves with compassion and love, but can you look deeply at yourself in total awe of the miracle you are?





Soften Beyond The Bone April 24, 2018

bone and water

Think of your body for a moment.  Your structural integrity is in the magnificent geometry of your bones.  Your bones give you stability & strength.  They hold us firm when the wind blows, and allow us to announce ourselves as upright, powerful beings of action in the world.  When compared to the rest of our physical being, however, they are rather stagnant, dense, and rigid in form.

It is the rest of us that creates fluidity, expansion, contraction, bending, rolling, and softness.  It is in the rest of us that we adapt, shift, and flow.

Now consider your energy.   For most of us, we’d love our energy to be less bone and more water (65% of the human body on average is water).  Adaptable yet powerful; intuitive yet purposeful.

Perhaps as a “perk” of living in the modern world, our energy can often feel hectic, depleted, fragmented, and chaotic.  Consider that as quickly as your thoughts change, as does your state of being.

And then we remember.  Re * Member that we are more than our thoughts, and that our thoughts are choice.   And thus, when we “feel” sub-optimal, we can use practices and rituals to smooth our energy & tap into the rivers and channels of our whole Self to restore flow.

Because we are glorious humans who are well trained in academia and poorly trained in self optimization, most of us are victim to our thoughts and thus, feel stressed, fatigued, and overwhelmed more than we might like.

Can you use your stress as a barometer versus a reaction?  When you feel it, pause.  What wisdom do you need to re*member?  Can you feel into the soft tissue of your body, sense your breath, and lean into space versus density?  When we do this, we sense our entire being;  body, spirit, and mind,  rhythmically harmonizing together.

In this state, we walk lightly through the world –  still creating results and enjoying pursuits, competing in sports, going after big opportunities, & taking risks  – but always coming back to a state of fullness and bliss.

Bliss doesn’t have to wait until all the checks are complete on the to-do.  We can learn to bring fluidity and grace to all moments.  With Patience.  With Practice.  With Belief.


After the final NO comes a YES April 17, 2018

So many of us talk in the language of constraint; feeling confined to the outcomes of decisions made in a more guarded heart, fearful mind, and less awake spirit.  We arrive at 30, 40, 50, 60, 70 years old, and we contemplate, “what’s possible given my reality?”  And then we stall because this question is like dragging all of our baggage, story, and past decisions into a field, stacking them upon one another, and then trying to see the meadow of possibility on the other side.

Our reality is a compilation of who we were in our yesterdays.  And yes – bricks and mortar, commitments, pets, and debt are real parts of this moment and cannot be simply dissolved to create space for path forward.  But could we ask this question:  What’s possible given my passion and capability?  If this answer differs from the above, please discontinue beating yourself up for stalling and instead compassionately soften to yourself and say; “I see you and I am with you as we align with what’s coming versus what has been.”

While grateful for the beauty of our lives, we might find ourselves in a chapter where what we’ve created feels like a shoe too small or a sweater too itchy.  Within us is the calling of our spirit; it is our life’s longing, a desire to impact our world.

We cannot change that clarity around or magnetic drawing to happened AFTER we made all these sticky, hard to untangle life choices, and thus, there is no reason to berate.  We are where we are now.

Be still and sit in inquiry:  What is the calling of my spirit?   Whatever it is, clear or not, trust it.  It is a seed in some stage of germination that wants our attention, nurturing hand, and invitation to emerge.

This “calling” is your truth.  Resist the urge to judge it against someone else’ or think it should be grander than it appears.  It may be a world stage or the privacy of your kitchen.  Allow it to emerge:  Listen deeply to it.

What is your impact?  What is your great work?

Build, sew, write, create, lead, cook, calculate, speak, invent, protect, teach, heal, fix, gather. Whatever it is, embrace it fully as this is how we embrace ourselves fully.  The glory isn’t in the outcome of what you do, it is in doing what brings you alive.

“And after the final no comes a lasting yes.”  


What is 40% of 70,000? April 11, 2018

70,000 * 40% = The majority of your waking hours

  • 70,000 thoughts a day (average human being)
  • 40%: conscious time spent in habitual behavior / thought.

Math Wizards:  Assuming we spend 1 second / thought, how much time daily do we spend playing the tapes of habitual thoughts?

Kudos!  A gold star for anyone who concluded ALMOST 10 HOURS.

Bonus Question:  If you sleep 8 hours, what % of our waking hours are spent living in the past (which is the birthing center of habit)?  That’s right – 62.5%

What I’ve grappled with, tried to defy, and earnestly studied is STOPPING THE MIND.  And I’m here to report, sadly, that for the typical human being, this is not possible.  Slowing the mind?  Creating space between thoughts?  Tapping into quietness of mind?  With much disciplined practice.  Stopping the mind?  This defies the higher order purpose of our brain.

Now, back to the power of the habit or samsara.  Samasara is the subconscious adhesion to repetition of cycles.  Often we consider habits to be negative; however, we all have habits that serve us well  (ie:  brushing our teeth).

And thank goodness for habits!  Otherwise, every moment would be a decision between a mountain of choices.  Should I brush my teeth with my rotary brush or my manual?  Maybe I should use my finger?  I wonder if I should use wintergreen or cinnamon?  Flouride or no flouride?  Warm water or cool?  Should I rinse before or after I brush?  90 seconds or 2 minutes?  Holy Tax The Brain Moly.

If our mind is going to think and we are naturally bent towards habit, what if we could shift our habit?  Instead of investing time and energy on the impossible, perhaps we could simply redeploy that energy to creating space in our minds, replacing negative internal chatter with positive, & use an intention of love and light as our focus.

What if you replaced the tape “I’m not smart enough” with “I am uniquely capable of living the life I envision for myself,”  or “I’m stressed because there aren’t enough hours in the day” with “I am committed to using my time and thus my life in the most purposeful way.”  What if we replaced numbering our neurosis with counting our blessings and listing our grievances with celebrating both the dark and the light?

Far fetched?  It doesn’t sound as ridiculous as allowing our thoughts to overrun our life and how we see ourselves without intervention.  We are willing to spend time on instagram and ruminations of the past – why not assume it natural to spend time on letting go of stories that limit our joy?

Imagine if you could use those ten hours positively & impactfully.  What would shift in your life?



International Women’s Day March 21, 2018

Recently on International Women’s Day, I posted this entry on Facebook.  It was more of a musing than cared for writing, but a number of people reached out to me afterwards to share their “spark” and continue the conversation.  Thus, I’m sharing broadly as, while my words, this is a collective state of being ready for manifestation.  Go Forth And Start The Dialog!


Happy International Women’s Day!

Beautiful female friends… This year has cracked open a long closed door. We may stand in front of that door marveling, celebrating, and talking about the breakthrough. And we should!

And, we must – with the grace, compassion, and strength that is inherent in us – step through the door to participate in lasting change. I sense that the door will remain ajar for some time but not forever. It is a time for forward movement & action; not talk and imagining. May we be teachers of strength through compassion, leadership through courage, and sustainable progress through our voice.

The door has been cracked because of women’s courage. May we engage in a collective pivot because of ours.



women's day